Inner Girl

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I'm in love with my best friend...

Monday, January 23, 2012

Thought of the week:

The more you encourage and celebrate others, the richer your life your own life will be.

Dear Dolly InnerGirl,

Dear DOLLY InnerGirl,

I moved states about 18 months ago leaving my best guy friend behind. We were extremely close. I've been back to visit once or twice since I moved away but every time I come back I realise just how much he really means to me. My feelings for him are more than friendly. I'm in love with him! I want to tell him, but our families are really close and I don't want to ruin what we have. What should I do?
Breeanna

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Answer:

Hello Breeanna,

As the saying says, “absence makes the heart grow fonder”. When we care about someone who is far away, we think about all the things we appreciate about them. It’s a way of keeping them close.

Another advantage of realising your true feelings is that you're keeping your mind off missing home. Let's examine the whole picture. Are you missing your old life more than ever? Could the feelings for this guy be helping you cope?

This is a life lesson we all have to learn. There are times we can deal with life better if we accept things as they are now. It seems like you are aware that sharing your feelings with your guy friend could possibly complicate things. You don't want to go there.

A way to get through this is to start fresh - from today. Concentrate on your new life, your new home and your new friends. Look for ways to have fun and enjoy your new environment. What do you have to be grateful for?

Start each day by writing in a gratitude diary. Reach out to peeps in the area. Find something you enjoy doing. Just choose to be happier! When your emotional vibe is happier and more positive, life tends to bring you gifts. Distance doesn’t prevent you and your guy friend from communicating. Be patient and it will sort itself out in it's own time.

Email us with your age and question at dollymail@acpmagazines.com.au with "DOLLYinnergirl" as the subject.

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User comments

it's normal to fall in love with your guy bestfriend, it happens to alot of people in particular.. me, I fell in love with my bestfriend Keith he is one of the most loving caring guys I've ever met. But I had a boyfriend at the time so it was really hard and mean at the same time, I had to chose my bestfriend or my boyfriend and suprisingly i chose my boyfriend.

Dolly InnerGirl, if that's the best answer you can give in this story my suggestion is get a life. You say "It seems like you are aware that sharing your feelings with your guy friend could possibly complicate things." Really? Do you know what she means by "I want to tell him, but our families are really close and I don't want to ruin what we have."? She talks about him, not about missing home. Nothing bad in asking him. If he says no, they can still be friends, and if he says yes, the families are going to be even closer. What possibly could she lose by being upfront with him? He isn't gonna say, I don't want to see you ever again.

I had the same thing! Thing is i told him and he didnt feel the same way and he said he never would... but everyone is different.. if you think he may take the risk!

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